Post-college plans

People ask me what I'm planning to do after graduation a lot, and I always tell them about how I want to move to Kentucky and go to graduate school in England - and I do. I don't mention everything else though....

- I want to learn to ride three-day-events. Cross country looks like awesome fun. This will not please my mother.

- As soon as I have my own place to live, and I can have pets, I'm going to the animal shelter and I'm going to adopt a black cat, a part-Siamese cat, and the cat that's been there the longest.

- If forced to make a choice between cable and Internet; psaw, no choice. Internet totally wins out. Especially when you can see virtually any TV show within a day or two.

- I may get a Wii. They look like fun.

- My friend Jenny keeps telling me I should marry someone in the horse industry. I want to marry a vet. That way, I can get all my animal care for free.

- I'm highly considering getting some show rabbits - can't decide between Holland lops and mini rexes though. Why can't there be a breed with rex fur and lop ears?

- I might also get a guinea pig. I've always wanted one but my mom's always been anti-rodent. And for those of you wondering, rabbits are not rodents. They're actually lagomorphs.

- I'm not going to have any spare time: I'm already planning to learn German, French, guitar, and piano, as well as write books and build websites.

- I want to get involved in local theater. It may not be my crazy dream of running away to star in "Wicked" on Broadway, but it could be fun.

- I have NO idea how I'm going to make friends.

- I will not go to a church of Christ. Honestly? I like having music. And I don't think God will send me to hell for that. He made it, after all. It's easier for me to find the right key when I have music - it frustrates me to no end that in voice class, I have no problems, and in church, I'm all over the place. When I'm frustrated because I don't sound good, and I know I can sound good, I'm not focused on worship.

- I might even occasionally have (*gasp!*) ALCOHOL! (oh dear, do you think my degree will get revoked?)

- I can not WAIT to have a decent kitchen. I'm going to be cooking up a storm.

- I can't wait to be allowed to burn candles whenever I want! I like candles.

- I honestly don't care if I have a real bed - I've slept on a mattress on the floor before. I do want a couple bookshelves though. Is it odd that I put the care of my books above my own comfort? Probably.

- It sounds horribly vain; but I desperately want a walk-in closet. I want to be able to look at my clothes and not have them all crammed onto one little rod.

I'm alternately thrilled and terrified by the prospect of being on my own. I think though, that it will definitely be an adventure, and who am I to turn down an adventure?

Wanted: the right guy

I've been thinking a lot lately about what I want in a guy - like every girl, I have an ideal guy. I'm a little negotiable about the details, but this is a general idea about what I want.

(so if you're a guy and you're Facebook stalking me to see what I like...here you go!)

Must:
- Be taller than me (sorry guys...there are plenty of great guys who are my height, but it just doesn't work for me)
- Be Christian
- Have a good sense of humor (if you can't appreciate Monty Python, you're out of the running)
- Be easy-going
- Have good communications skills (I know, this is a lot to ask for in a guy, and I'm not asking for him to share all his feelings, but if something's bothering him, I want him to be able to tell me)
- Be devoted to being a good husband and father
- Be my best friend (or one of them...there are some things guys just can't get)
- Be able to handle the fact that I will be out risking my neck working with horses, and you can no sooner take it out of me than you can cut off my head
- Like animals (lots and lots of animals)
- Be able to deal with the fact that I have as many moods as I do shirts (and I have a LOT of shirts) and they can switch extremely rapidly (depending on the time of month). I may not wake up the same person three days in a row.
- Be fairly intellectual and able to discuss interesting things.
- Love kids (I'm planning on having at least five)
- Buy me flowers occasionally, for no reason at all.

Preferences:
- Enjoy games (all sorts)
- Brown hair
- Older than me (my parents and one set of my grandparents were the other way around, but I don't think I want it)
- Speak a foreign language (German preferably, but anything else works as well)
- Like science-fiction TV shows (however, liking "Star Trek: Enterprise" throws you out of the running, because that's just WRONG on SO many levels)
- Enjoy Europe
- Willing to cook occasionally
- Fairly optimistic

There's probably a few others I've forgotten - but for the hoards of guys beating down my door (yeah right) this is a good start.

A decision

I've come to a decision. Or maybe it's more of a revelation. I don't know, really.

I've decided I'm going to stop letting myself be defined by a number on the scale, my love life or lack thereof, a grade in a class, people who choose not to talk to me, or my reputation. There is only one person with the power to control me - and that's me. Why do I let other people set the standards I live by? In the end, it's my life. My choices. My decisions. I am blessed to be a young woman who is only four weeks away from being a college graduate. While so many of my friends are tying themselves down with majors they don't love, jobs they're not passionate about, and people that they do love, I have none of that. I've got a degree I've loved (and one that I really wasn't crazy about, but that's okay), I can find a job that keeps me interested, and I don't have a boyfriend or husband to tie me down. I can move to Kentucky if I want - I can go to graduate school in England if I want.

The world is out there, and it's full of possibilities for me. I can do anything. I can be who I want to be. I can go somewhere and be whomever I want to be.

It's kind of exciting.

Random Thoughts From 25-35 Year Olds

Random thoughts from 25-35 year olds (with my comments added)

- I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option. (totally agree)

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can
think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell
my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves
me. (er...done that)

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong. (totally agree)

-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to
have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and
sticks when they've invented the lighter?

-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're
going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to
be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the
direction from which you came, you have to first do something like
check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to
yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're
crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk. (err....done that...)

-That's enough, Nickelback. (disagree there, I like Nickelback)

-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. (funny how you hate it when you're a kid, and it's all you want when you're an adult)

-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know"
feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose
not to be friends with? (definitely true for me)

-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't
work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically
fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all
know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards
or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft. (true that)

-There is a great need for sarcasm font. (Linetta and I encase comments in "+" to denote sarcasm)

-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and
suddenly realize I had no idea what the f was going on when I first
saw it. (oh gosh, yes)

-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually
becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting
90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's
laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little
bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the
only one who really, really gets it. (it's a little stressful to have a movie I really love that I'm showing to other people for the first time, and I'm constantly wondering, "Will they like it? Will they hate it? If they hate it, are they going to think I'm a freak because I love it?")

-How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? (actually, I can fold fitted sheets...mwahaha)

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than
take 2 trips to bring my groceries in. (true)

- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die. (I have nothing to hide)

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to
finish a text. (eeeeeeviiiilllll...don't text and drive, people)

- LOL has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say". (ohmygosh, that is SO TRUE)

- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger. (that's a problem sometimes...)

- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron
test is absolutely petrifying. (or just a plain old multiple choice test...does tend to drive me crazy and make me look over what I've answered)

- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart",
all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart". (HAHAHA!!!)

- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear what they said? (I usually try to limit it to two)

- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in'
examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete
idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and
said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies" (I was trying to come up with some sort of comparison today and drew a total blank. This is very true)

-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other? (that would be HILARIOUS!)

- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and
i instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I
know how to get out of my neighborhood. (always bugs me)

- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died. (honestly, I'm glad I'm not the only one morbid enough to think this)

- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the
shower first and THEN turn on the water. (there ARE?! FREAKS!!!)

-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever. (shirts and underwear - one day each. Pants? Three to four days each, minimum. Heck yeah)

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired. (actually, my six weeks off during the summer was probably it...)

- Bad decisions make good stories (true)

-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their
profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got
the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if
I do! (extremely true)

- Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year? (high schoolers get younger and younger every year...no, I was NEVER that young and stupid)

-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring
would probably just be completely invisible. (oh yeah...)

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go
around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly
nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be
a problem.... (exactly! I always get nervous...and there's no reason to)

-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything
productive for the rest of the day. (happens to me every Friday)

-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't
want to have to restart my collection. (please!)

-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are
going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far. (very, very true)

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to. (oh yeah...that's a second of sheer terror)

- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever. (because seriously, who can afford the dry cleaning? Or the time to handwash?)

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people
watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will
they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't
watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and
leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?' (see comment on the movie)

-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and
goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone
and run away? (*coughMOMcough*)

- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not
seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste. (and it never fails...the better I look, the less likely I will see anyone I want to impress, but on the days when I didn't get enough sleep, so I've thrown my hair up into a rough ponytail, thrown on jeans I've worn for the last four days, and grab the first T-shirt I put a hand on [which is inevitably stained] I'll run right into whoever I was trying to impress before)

-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she
hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light
internet stalking. (well, a new anyone...)

-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,
then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes. (true that)

-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising
speed for pedophiles...

- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers,
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still
not know what time it is.

-It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call. (nope...but I screen calls)

-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it. (but the Internet could tell me)

-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would
happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that? (the world would end)

-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and
the link takes me to a video instead of text. (I never go to CNN.com...but I hate it when I want to read something and there's a video)

-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they
drive behind obeys the speed limit. (haha!)

-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

Poem: "Do You?"

Do you miss me as much as I miss you?
Do you want to pull me close when the day is through,
Press your lips to mine and hold me tight,
And sleep by my side throughout the night?

Do you have the feeling something's missing from your side?
Some spark of light hasn't entered your life?
Somethings happens, news you want to share,
You look for me, and realize I'm not there.

Do your arms feel as empty as mine?
Loneliness and sadness and longing to find,
The one with whom you'll share your life,
Your love, your joy, your heart - your wife.

Do you want to see me dressed in white,
You in your tux, and I, your bride,
Coming down the aisle, tears in my eyes,
As I joyfully promise the rest of my life?

Do you look for me in people around
Trying to pick out my face in the crowd?
Though you don't know it, you're hoping to see
That one perfect face, and you'll know it's me!

Poem: "Castles In The Air"

I'm building castles in the air.
A foolish thing, I know,
But I can never escape the desire
To arrange my life just so.

I'm building castles in the air,
I'm planning out each part
Hoping none of my bricks will fall
And crush my fragile heart.

I'm building castles in the air
Though castles they may not seem
They hold the treasure of all my hopes,
My wishes, and my dreams.

I'm building castles in the air
Though I know someday I'll find
Castles of fantasy, and those of reality
Are very different kinds.

I'm building castles in the air
Though a prince I do not seek.
Just a simple, honest man to be
Friend, comfort, and helpmeet.

I'm building castles in the air
And I know someday I'll see
While I built them, God was laughing
For He had a better plan for me.